The Feedback Fear Factor: Why We Avoid It and Why We Shouldn't

Let’s be honest—feedback can feel scary. It can feel like judgment, criticism, or even a personal attack. And because of that, many of us avoid it like the plague. We tweak someone’s work ourselves rather than giving them constructive feedback. We tolerate behaviours we don’t enjoy just to sidestep an awkward conversation. We save feedback for formal processes like PDP reviews rather than making it a regular part of how we work.

But here’s the truth: dodging feedback is just a short-term fix. In the long run, it serves no one. No one learns, no one grows, and valuable wisdom goes unshared.

The Problem with Poor Feedback (Or No Feedback at All!)

When feedback is given unskilfully, it can have some pretty rough consequences:

• It can alienate you from your team.

• It can damage good working relationships.

• It can create a lack of trust among colleagues.

• It can make people feel like they’ve lost control over their work (a big factor in burnout and stress!).

  
  

On the flip side, receiving feedback poorly can be just as damaging:

• It can generate unnecessary conflict.

• It can create barriers to improvement.

• It can make you feel frustrated, demotivated, undervalued, or just plain stressed.

• It can shut down your growth mindset.

  
  

With all of this negativity surrounding feedback, it’s no wonder that individuals and businesses tend to avoid it unless absolutely necessary.

But what if we could change that mindset?

Flipping the Script on Feedback

Feedback isn’t about tearing someone down; it’s about building them up. It promotes professional growth, enhances skills, and fosters a culture of continuous learning. It can boost confidence, improve job satisfaction, and help people feel truly seen and heard in the workplace. Who doesn’t want that?

But here’s the catch—it takes courage.

Courage to give it, courage to receive it, and courage to act on it.

Feedback = Bravery

Bravery isn’t just about skydiving or giving a TED talk. It’s about having the guts to give honest, thoughtful feedback and the resilience to receive it without getting defensive. It’s about leaning into those slightly uncomfortable conversations because we know that, ultimately, they’ll make us better.

So next time you’re tempted to do the work yourself instead of coaching a colleague, or bite your tongue instead of offering constructive advice—pause. Choose the brave option. Because when we embrace feedback, we create workplaces where people thrive, grow, and achieve their best.

Go on—be bold. Give (and receive) feedback like a pro!